Teddy's Memorial

 This has been a very emotional and heart-wrenching three days for us.  We are animal people, and we loved Teddy very much.  He was a member of our family.  We found joy in our every day activities with him.  Some days he drove me insane, but I loved him.  The kids played with him often, much to his dismay.  :)  He didn't like being dressed up and driven around in a baby carriage, but he tolerated it.  :)  He always had a lap to snuggle in.  The morning Teddy died Jeannie brought over a beautiful flower arrangement with a red candle in the center.  As soon as I saw it I knew what we were going to do.  Tonight we lit it, talked about Teddy, shed some more tears, and then finally blew it out and watched the smoke ascend heavenward. 

 Teddy was a pain in the butt sometimes.  He would get into the trash and eat gross things.  If Sadie or Xander left their diapers on the floor, he would eat it.  Ya, I know, gross.  He loved to lick things like feet.  He used to pull bowls off of the table tops and smash them.  Sometimes he would make a mistake inside...but it was usually because we were too busy and distracted and forgot about him, it was never his fault.  He was a good dog and when he needed to go outside, he would stand by the door, or come to the room we were in and look at us, bidding us to follow him to the door. 

 Teddy slept in bed with Sean and I.  If I got into bed before Sean, then he would growl and attack Sean when Sean came to bed.  It drove us both nuts, but we still let him come to bed every night.  When we knew something was seriously wrong with Teddy, early that morning, Sean came over to pick Teddy up off of my lap to take him to the animal hospital and Teddy growled and bit Sean (not hard).  It's kind of nice to know that even in Teddy's extremity, he was still himself. He still had some bite left in him. If Sean would move around in bed, Teddy would growl, and sometimes attack his feet.  Sean HATED this, but he loved the dog.  Teddy was a little love...always wanting to snuggle and be close to his people.  As the kids felt the warmth of the flame of this candle, Nicole said, "It's Teddy saying 'I love you'."  I think she is right. 

 Nicole and Cassidy shared their feelings tonight.  They both cried and hoped for Teddy to be happy where he now is.  Teddy was useful.  Last night the missionaries came for dinner - our first dinner at home without Teddy - and Sadie spilled her bowl of rice onto the carpet in the dining room.  Sean and I looked at each other and said, "Oh, where's Teddy?"  He was our little vacuum.  He was always under foot and seemed to get stepped on too frequently, but we miss bumping into him.  There are many things, over the last 3 days, that have struck me strange without him here.  Going to bed at night is hard.  I used to bend over and tap my leg and he'd come.  He always knew when it was time for bed, and he would get so excited, because it was his time to be with us.  Waking up was hard, too, we didn't have to get up and get outside in the cold. We'd always go out with him, and stand near him as he went to the bathroom, because we didn't want our friendly neighborhood owl to get to him.  Sundays were Teddy's favorite day, because we would come home from church and he knew he was going for a car ride to Grandma and Papa's house where he would be fed terrible human food.  :)  He loved Sundays and would go nuts until we changed our clothes and invited him into the car.  I miss his snoring.  I could always hear him..he was a loud breather.  Right now, Sean is snoring next to me, and it's just not as cute.  :) 

 After our memorial we blew out the candle and Heidi said the smoke was like Teddy's spirit going up to heaven.  I prefer believing he is near to us, still, very near, as in running-around-the-house-like-a-ghost sort of near.  I really don't know, but I like to think he knows what we say about him and can still be near his people. 

Teddy's light will always be with us.  We love you Teddy boy!