I've only talked with a few people about what we're doing next year. This morning I was walking and bumped into the mom of one of Nicole's classmates and we briefly discussed school beginning on August 17th. I didn't tell her that Nicole would not be in Natalie's class this year. I don't really know how to talk about it, because, naturally, everyone wants to know why we've chosen to do this. There are a lot of reasons, but the most important ones are not really ones that I can articulate, or really want to articulate. I just feel like it's the right thing for us, for now, but I'm not really sure why. The school our girls have gone to is fantastic and supportive. I have so many doubts - doubts about my abilities - and I don't want to hear negative feedback that will discourage me. But I feel so strongly about it, despite all of that, and I am propelled forward in this journey by some force that comes from outside of me.
I'm mostly excited, though! I am so anxious to learn right along with my girls! I can hardly wait to curl up and read more books with them, and relearn the things that I was taught and that have been long forgotten. I am excited to become a better teacher through this. After all, teaching has been my lifelong dream. I remember being 6 years old and playing school and imagining the day I would teach "for reals". I am excited to go to the zoo or the museum or take a trip somewhere and to learn in fun and interesting new ways. I'm really excited to break my kids out of the brick and mortar mold. I hope this cultivates in them a life-long love of learning and exploring. I hope, I hope, I hope!!! I have so many hopes.
Since this is our first year, I'm experimenting by choosing an online public school. I will have access to teachers that can help me when I'm stuck, or when my kids are stuck. We will still have testing. I will not be completely alone. I want to gain confidence before I venture out with independent curriculum materials. The school we've chosen uses the k-12 curriculum.
I'm going to homeschool Caz, as well. She doesn't qualify for public school yet, but she is more than ready. I just purchased her math curriculum, and I can hardly wait to get my hands on it and begin teaching her! She's a sponge!
Nicole and Heidi are looking forward to something a bit different. I hope we all adjust okay. I have my really nervous moments, like today when I got the boxes marked "K-12", but for the most part, I have felt a lot of peace. I'll be okay, we'll be okay. This is what we need right now, even if I don't really understand all of the reasons why.
I am sure you feel overwhelmed- it is a big responsibility. But if you feel it is the right thing then you must go with that. I had considered it myself at one time. All you can do is try! When we lived in Orlando and I was in YW- I had two girls in my class that were homeschooled and I could tell the differnce- very mature for their age. Good Luck and happy learning! :)
ReplyDeleteElaine, you can do this! Good for you for moving forward despite your fears. We are sending you our support. We love ya!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazing Elaine! I have no doubt that this will be a success for you and your kids! I'm sure this has been a subject of lots of prayer, and now you have to trust that He knows you and what is best for your kids and you, and that He will help you all to be successful! I can't wait to hear how it goes!
ReplyDeleteGood for you, Elaine. This is something I've always thought would be something I'd like to try. But I'm scared to do it and Keith doesn't want to. I have looked into the k12 program though and think it's a good one. Good luck!! Keep us updated!!
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